I find that people come to see me for two main reasons with regards to their career – either they are experiencing dissatisfaction with their career choice/are undecided about what career to choose, or they are experiencing interpersonal difficulties at work.
I feel very strongly that we all deserve to do work that we truly enjoy, and that calls to our own unique interests and talents. I wrote a blog about this, which you can read here. Where many people often can get stuck is in feeling like they don’t have a sense of what might be the right path for them. The good news is that there is no need to get hung up on finding the “just right” job or direction before you get started. If you follow your curiosity and genuine interest, you can’t go wrong.
Our curiosities, interests and deep growth are generated from our depths, and this is where therapy can be very helpful. You may already sense that you need the help of a trained therapist to help you come more into contact with this source of your creativity, which can be quite covered over. With this growth, you can begin to come to trust your inclinations.
Building a career often involves taking risks, and it can help to have a therapist there to aid you in discerning what makes sense, and to support you in gathering the courage and steadfastness that is often required to move ahead.
Interpersonal Problems at Work
While people sometimes come to see me because they are struggling with a colleague, the difficulty that I most often encounter is an issue with the individual’s boss. Sometimes, after careful consideration, and after having made the efforts I describe below, the client decides that it is best to leave the role or organization. Other times, a big difference can derive from what I think of as “learning to understand difficult people”. It’s amazing what can happen if you take a compassionate stance towards difficult people at work.
In health, we would all be kind towards, and supportive of, each other. It is our wounds that make us challenging to be around. No one sets out to be a difficult boss/colleague/person, but early emotional wounds can make for a boss or colleague who is defensive, glory-seeking, secretive, domineering, you name it. If you can come to look at this colleague or boss with understanding for what they need to protect, are there ways you can avoid activating their particular wounds, while maintaining your own boundaries and dignity? This is what we explore together.
Lastly, I frequently work with people who come into therapy because they have been given feedback about their own behaviour at work. In this case, we start with the feedback they have been given, and then get to work on their understanding of it. We take the time together to come to understand how the lenses through which the client views the world have become distorted, and to offer healing to those places that have resulted in the behaviours that trouble others.
If you would like to discuss how I might be able to help you in your own career situation, or if you are an employer looking for help for an employee with interpersonal issues, I invite you to contact me to arrange for a free consultation at my office in downtown Toronto.